(Originally published in the October 2017 issue of The National Notary magazine.)
"Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present." — George Washington
On August 12, Heather D. Heyer lost her life during a chaotic rally of white nationalists in Charlottesville, Virginia. The 32-year-old woman, a Notary Public, had joined a group of counter protesters to voice their opposition against white supremacist ideology. According to those who knew her, she was a passionate advocate for the disenfranchised and was dedicated to campaigning against hate.
Heyer was killed when a 20-year-old man from Ohio — described as having radical beliefs about white supremacy — reportedly drove a car into the group of counter protesters. Nineteen other people were injured.
Heyer paid the ultimate price for standing up for her beliefs. And while tragedies like these are rare, her story is a sobering illustration of just how destructive our country’s decline of civility has become.
The impact on our social fabric is so significant that a record-high 69 percent of Americans believe we are amid a major civility problem, and 75 percent believe the problem has reached crisis levels, according to a recent study. Gone are the days of courtesy, integrity and respect amid opposing viewpoints. Instead, political or social discourse often results in harassment, intimidation, threats, discrimination, cyberbullying and even violence.
Heyer was a victim of that ugly form of discourse, even though she was in Charlottesville to lead by example in advocating for civility. By nature of their duty to protect consumers and the public trust, America’s 4.4 million Notaries Public consistently practice the pillars of impartiality, civility and public service. Her motives were in line with the spirit of the Notary community, and illustrative of the examples that Notaries set every day.
Still, despite the country’s festering environment of conflict and hatred, experts believe there are solutions that can significantly improve our relationships and lives. And in recent studies, Americans have demonstrated a clear desire to improve civility in our nation.
How did we get here?
"Little progress can be made by merely attempting to repress what is evil. Our great hope lies in developing what is good." — Calvin Coolidge
This situation didn’t happen overnight. In fact, indications are that the problem began decades ago and reached crisis levels during the 2016 presidential campaign. In a 2017 study titled Civility In America VII: The State Of Civility, researchers established the top five causes:
- The behavior of politicians, role models and systemic issues in government
- The rise of the internet and social media
- The competitive mainstream media and the 24/hour news cycle
- America’s youth culture
- Demonstrators and protestors
Additionally the study, conducted by Weber Shandwick and Powell Tate in partnership with KR Research, revealed that most Americans are reluctant to take responsibility for the crisis. In fact, 94 percent of people polled said they always or usually act civil, and are respectful of others.
“All of these elements have driven us to the state we are currently in, as we have developed a culture of reactivity instead of personal reflection,” said Carolyn J. Lukensmeyer, Ph.D., Executive Director of the National Institute for Civil Discourse (NICD).
“We have watched the behavior of our leaders and role models decline amid hyper-partisanship. The 24-hour competitive news cycle has led to instant reactions and opinions where news is being reported before the facts are clear. And the anonymity of social media has emboldened those with more extreme positions to reach and embolden countless others to spread those beliefs,” Lukensmeyer continued. “What we are now seeing is three decades of structural and cultural problems that have led us to this level of vicious rhetoric and behavior.”
One of the most telling examples is the mood in America following the 2016 presidential election, which vaulted uncivil, venomous rhetoric in politics to levels never before seen in our country’s history. Now 11 months after the election, Americans continue to demonize and attack those who voted against their candidate of choice.
But following the 2000 election — a similar controversial contest in which George W. Bush won the presidency — America’s reaction was much different. “People kept their discontent focused on Bush — a singular person,” Lukensmeyer said. “None of it was about your neighbors, friends or family like it is today.”
America’s mood is also having a significant impact on our country’s workforce and productivity. The NICD is increasingly receiving inquiries from executives at major U.S. corporations which need to rebuild trust and cooperation in their workforce. “They tell us that most of their important teams have not recovered their capacity to work at the same level of productivity since the election, and they want our help. This is so surprising to me,” Lukensmeyer said.
It’s obvious that the civility crisis has become a chronic condition. Americans have become accepting of behaviors that would have been shameful not too long ago. And in some cases, uncivil behavior is applauded and rewarded.
Click to view full size chart.
It wasn't always this way
"Be civil to all, sociable to many, familiar with few, friend to one, enemy to none." — Benjamin Franklin
Ironically, what many Americans have forgotten is that our current crisis of incivility is occurring in a country that was founded on the very ideals of civility, partnership and compromise. We would not have a U.S. Constitution were it not for the Great Compromise of 1787.
But even though conflict and hatred is winning most of today’s headlines and Social Media posts, we are surrounded by reminders — past and present — that keep our country’s core ideals alive. To be sure, we have not always been this uncivil.
America’s Notaries, for example, often serve document signers whose beliefs or lifestyles run contrary to their own. But even if the document being notarized is tied to issues like same-sex marriage, abortion, immigration or other hot-button social issues, Notaries remain impartial and uphold their central duty to serve the public and protect them from fraud.
Medical professionals face even more daunting civility challenges. Their patients can be of any race, national origin, belief system or education level, and they are often sick or suffering. As a result, medical professionals repeatedly face slights, rebuffs, injustices, rudeness, embarrassments and many other uncivil acts. But again, most medical professionals take the high road.
At a macro level, great things have been achieved in our country during times when our leaders and role models acted more civil, and patriotism took precedence over partisanship.
On June 10, 1964, 27 Republican senators partnered with 44 Democrats to vote in favor of the Civil Rights Act of 1964. President Lyndon Johnson signed the act into law nine days later. Getting there, however, wasn’t easy. At the time Democrats controlled the Senate with 67 members. But 21 southern Democrats opposed the bill and launched the longest filibuster in Senate history. Then-Democratic majority leader Mike Mansfield and his counterpart, Republican Senator Everett Dirksen, joined together and rallied across party lines to end the filibuster and pass the historic Act, which included the 27 “yes” votes from Republicans.
What you can do about it
"We must be ever courteous and patient with those who do not see eye to eye with us. We must resolutely refuse to consider our opponents as enemies." — Mahatma Gandhi
Civility is an important ideal in the American tradition. And while we are amid a crisis threatening the livelihood of that ideal, there are plenty of ideas and tactics we can employ to restore it. It begins by practicing a basic concept: Look in the mirror instead of pointing the finger.
“In my experience, something magic happens when we look at each other and keep the best versions of ourselves and others in our eyes,” said Tyler Hester, the outgoing Senior Managing Director at Teach for America in Richmond, California — an organization working to improve civility among educators.
The good news is, individuals, groups and organizations across the country have begun taking steps to restore civility in their communities. In Maine, motivational speaker Craig Freshley launched a campaign called the “Make Shift Coffee House” — an event that moves from community to community where people with opposing political views can meet, learn from each other and have some good coffee.
In Arizona, the National Institute for Civil Discourse has launched a “Revive Civility” campaign, which empowers groups and individuals to become “Citizens for Reviving Civility.” The program offers guidance, resources and tools to help people combat incivility in their communities.
And Notaries have a rallying point around the Notary Public Code of Professional Responsibility, in which the first guiding principle dictates that Notaries “serve all of the public in an honest, fair and unbiased manner.”
In the end, the most important thing you can do is listen to and understand the people with opposing viewpoints, instead of debating them, judging them and trying to force them to have a different opinion.
“When people take time for reflection versus reaction, and when they truly take the time to listen to someone else’s point of view, they have a valuable new experience,” Lukensmeyer said. “On the basis of that new experience people are often willing to take the next step to tackle harder issues. It’s very, very inspiring to see this happen.”
Phillip Browne is Vice President of Communications for the National Notary Association.
Tips for Restoring Civility
While the methods of practicing civility aren’t new or revolutionary, they are largely being ignored today. However, experts say practicing these common suggestions will have a measurable impact on overcoming incivility.
• Seek out a variety of reliable news sources with different perspectives.
• Allow others to speak, and listen closely to build mutual understanding.
• Don’t blame your opponent for everything that goes wrong.
• Understand that people aren’t morally bankrupt if they hold an opposing viewpoint.
• Speak calmly and avoid shouting.
• Don’t try to win arguments at any cost.
• Avoid social media conflicts, and refrain from posting inflammatory content.
• Don’t lie or exaggerate to convince people of your point.
• Seek common ground in your conversations.
• Avoid rumors and gossip, and don’t perpetuate them.
• Be cordial and welcoming so it’s safe for the other person to have a dialogue with you.
• Don’t jump to conclusions or assume you know what another person’s thinking.
• Start or join a civility group in your workplace.
Source: National Institute for Civil Discourse, ICMA, Weber Shandwick, Powell Tate.